22 11 2010

Here is  a best of Craig’s List candidate from our fair city. NOTE-LEAVING NEIGHBOR.


13 09 2010

Hear ye, here ye. All shocker and all friends of shockers, this includes but is not limited to juggalos, juggalettes, hippies (old school and neuvo) any slackers, losers, weirdos, or outkasts please gather ’round; there is a travesty at hand.  However, if we unite,  join our forces and stand as one, there may be time to avert.

It has come to the attention of theshockersculture through this link, Tulsa’s native son Johnny Polygon wants to return home.

Johnny Polygon: soooo I really wanted to throw a party in tulsa & preview my new music for my hometown but NONE of the promoters are down. pretty lame. guess la, ny, & paris will have to do. sorry guys, I tried.

This is preposterous! theshockerscultue would like to beg the question, what kind of so called promoter would not be down for bringing dopestflyestogpimpplayahardcoremotherfucker to come out of Tulsa, Oklahoma in a very long time? Not only is Johnny blowing up in America via MTV and BET Centric with his stylish video to the stylish Riot Song; he’s blowing up world wide, getting mad radio play across the pond in Paris. France not Texas.  Something that doesn’t seem to even be happening in his hometown. This is like softball boys, all you got to do is swing. Unacceptable. Might we  suggest, Johnny, you fire these “promoters” and find some homies who are down, because these guys don’t seem to be cutting it. Maybe you should  go talk to the guy with the apartment, he seems nice.

In the mean time, SHOCKERS UNITE!  Lets get it on and on and on and on for Johnny Polygon. We invite everyone to join the initiative and bring johnny home. Now, tell us. What are YOU gonna do?

but mom…….

10 08 2010

Individuality, not only is it a staple of universal parentdom, it is the essential asset at the core of Shockerdom.  While mom used it as either, a tool of  reasoning with the unreasonable, or as a proverbial ixnay on any friend-fluential out of budget fashion and/or any out of ordinary fun; The Shockers have  slightly different modi operandi.  here at theshockersculture, Shockers promote individuality as a means to an end.  and that end is Freedom. it’s at the core of everything we do here.  it’s the underlying theme of 99% of our content. we believe everyone deserves an unfettered opportunity to “be who you be, not what they thought, not what they want.”  it doesn’t matter who, it only matters you. only trend-setters set trends; if you lead, they will follow, but only if they want to. they wanted to, they all wanted to. so they did.

take two Mountain Sprout shows, plus two Johnny Polygons, multiplied by two nights camping and one 6 mile river float and you get an awesome packed, action/adventure romp of a lifetime (rated M for mature).  Or, an average Shocker weekend as the case often times is.  and such the case was the last weekend of july when Shockers and co. met in collusion of blatant maternal disobedience, by giving a great, united eff you to moms everywhere.  what do they know anyway?  present MILF/GILF’s excluded.

today’s lesson: next time mom tries the old fun squashing/teachable moment combo and asks that played out, age old question  “if all your friends were jumping off the side of a cliff, would you jump right along with them?” do as a Shocker do-os, show her this picture;

and say, “FuckiN right doggy! All the cool kids are doiN it.”

Stay tuned to theshockersculture for the latest of the whats what.  This week we will join our political correspondent Kate Robinson live in DC for our first foray into Shocker poly-ticks.  poly meaning many, ticks meaning blood suckers.  For now this is Dizzel signing off ’till next time.

Shocker Out.

“river float”

28 07 2010

It’s all ways good to be a Shocker. This weekend it’s twice as nice!! Double down this weekend as not one, but two of theshockersculture fan favorites are available for your end of week enjoyment.

Festivities begin early Friday 7/30, when the early birds high fly the coop and head for a few days of natures mothering at her finest.  Head East young man. At precisely noonish a.m. in a still yet to be determined location an elite smattering of revelers will gather in caravan on a collision course with the rising sun. Their destination, the spacious campgrounds of the always accommodating Diamondhead Resort (12081 Highway 10 Tahlequah, OK 74464-8168)  and the long, cool embrace of the scenic Illinois River.

Diamondhead? Tahlequah? Illinois River?  What does that spell? Float trip bitches?? That’s right the semi-biannual “down with the clown” camp-out/float trip is once again upon us. Come on already, all the cool kids are doing it.

The fun begins Friday upon arrival  Those interested in early bird camping should contact their local Shocker representative for more specificities on that days exit strategy.

If you’re unable to attend Fridays pre-party at the river fear not, all is not lost.  Hope lives on near 18th and Boston in the musical styling of Mountain Sprout; the head banging, blue grass hippies from the hills of Arkansas.  Join them @ 9pm Friday, 7/30  at Mercury Lounge for a guaranteed good time. Go green, get in the spirit of things and let the essence of ditty’s such as  “Shitting in the woods” get you in the camping mood. If that doesn’t do it for you, this classic will.

The flotilla shoves off around noon Saturday, 7/31 approximately 24hrs from the initial exodus, however a slight delay could be in the forecast. Understandably, there is a slight chance of intermittent blues due to the understandable absences of fandom from the local show of a favorite band. It seems, however, that long ago fate had decided that this weekend was meant to be a Mountain Sprout of a Shocker weekend.

like this one

And so it came to be that on the very weekend of the 3rd semi-biannual “down with the clown” camp-out/float trip, two key shows were booked. One at the Mercury Lounge a suburb of Shockerville and one at the Crowbar ( 407 N. Muskogee Tahlequah, OK).

Confirmation of the fate theory depends on this one contributing factor. What time they play.  The show may be seen.  Maybe not.  If they play early or late enough to fit in the river float, it could happen.  Couldn’t it? Maybe but not likely. Even less likely, but more awesomely They float along. What do ya say guys, wanna go for a float? No? Ok, well….. mind giving a few of our friends a ride to the river???

hometown homeboy

24 07 2010

Check him out. His name is Johnny Polygon and he hails from the mean streets of Tulsa, Oklahoma. Who knew.

Man arrested fighting for ‘right to dance’ in Oklahoma City | Tulsa World

25 06 2010

Man arrested fighting for ‘right to dance’ in Oklahoma City | Tulsa World.

this is a test, this is only a test.

23 06 2010

Attention all Shockers- the recent motion to replace our original theme song, “we are the shockers”, with the 2006 release, “Rock the Shocker”, by unknown “artist” Peaches, is denied in what would surely have been a 3 to 1 landslide against the change. Anonymous sources indicate the stupid fucking title of her album entitled “impeach my Bush” was the deciding factor in the decision.